Dear pre-teens, teenagers, young girls, women, and everyone remotely female,
You do not have to be blonde, white, and have coloured eyes to be beautiful.
You do not need a specific waist size or hip size or bust size to be attractive.
You don’t need expensive hairdos, buckets of makeup, or accessories to stand out.
You do not need ass-hugging jeans, painted-on tops, high heels that push your ass up prominently, body piercings, tattoos in suggestive areas to be desirable.
Actually, you do not need to be beautiful, attractive, or desirable.
You need to be true to yourself. To your individuality, that unique spark that makes you you.
What do you like to do?
But you have no answer to that, because no one ever told you that you could like things on your own. All you’ve ever known is that as a girl, a woman, you’re supposed to be sexy, flirty, friendly but not too friendly, mysterious but not too elusive, stylish but not too trendy, air-headed but not too flighty.
Do you like to paint? Or draw? Or write?
Do you want to construct buildings and skyscrapers and banks and homes?
Do you want to do interior decorating? Open up a flower shop? Be a party planner? Design clothes?
Do you want to serve and protect people as a cop or firefighter?
Do you want to be a veterinarian, helping injured animals, or an animal rights activist, helping and protecting animals?
A doctor, healing people, giving people hope in miracles? A surgeon, giving people’s lives back to them?
A social worker, helping those with the sort of disturbed home life you had, helping orphans? An NGO worker, protecting minorities, women, disabled children, the elderly?
A car racer? A sportswoman? A businesswoman? An entrepreneur? A teacher?
A musician perhaps, or a singer, or an actress? Or an anchorwoman on a news channel, or a journalist?
The possibilities are endless. You can be all this, and more. There are hidden talents inside you. Discover them and use them to spread joy to others. There is an intelligent mind in your head. Nurture it, watch the world around you and learn, read, travel, meet different people, because even the most vile, reprehensible person can teach you something.
You will make your own way in this world on the basis of your deeds, your work. And people will flock to you, look up to you, and admire you for everything you are. Learn humility for them, even as you try to nurture the person inside them, to teach them to realize their inner potential. Your path will be difficult because unfortunately, life tends to be like an abusive ex-boyfriend, constantly haunting you and stopping your progress with flashbacks and repressed memories. But you are capable of overcoming those difficulties, because a vagina is not a sign of weakness. It just indicates your gender. It’s a part of your body, nothing more, nothing less.
Who you are, depends on your actions, your words, your good nature, your amiability, your honesty and integrity, your kindness.
Who you are, does not depend on how aroused a man gets by your outfit, or how many boys ask you out to the prom. Who you are in life, is not dependent on how many ladies want their sons to marry you. Who you become one day, does not depend on the colour of your skin or hair, your fashion sense, your expertise with frivolities like hairstyling and makeup, your coquetry, your tailored giggles and flirty glances.
You are who you make of yourself in life.
You are never, ever, anything on the basis of your physical appearance and sexual desirability alone. They have zero significance, and well they should, considering that they get in the way of the outstanding individual you could be, if you weren’t trying to get a Kardashian body or Jennifer Anniston haircuts or rocker chic raccoon eyes.
You rock. Not because you’re hot or sexy or pretty. But because you’re you.